Welcome to Mott’s Mountain
Please knock loud. Bigfoot hard of hear.
Hello. Bigfoot here. Dis just normal woods place. Very humble. Very small.
Some humans say dis house “too fancy.” Bigfoot say those humans wrong and jealous.
🏡 Bigfoot’s Totally Normal Cabin
- Bedrooms: 5 (for friends who never leave)
- Bathrooms: Many. Bigfoot shed a lot.
- Garage: 5 cars (Bigfoot don’t even drive)
- Deck: Big. For thinking.
Bigfoot not rich. Bigfoot just good with money. And luck. And mystery.
🚪 Bigfoot Give You Tour
🛋 Living Room
TV only 98 inch because store run out of bigger. Fireplace real wood. And backup fireplace.
🍳 Kitchen
Bigfoot cook wild berries. Sometimes DoorDash. Racoon banned from fridge.
🏊 Pool
Natural spring pool. With heater. And lights that change color. Very natural.
🔥 Sauna
For fur maintenance. From Finland. Bigfoot not know where Finland is.
🚗 Garage
Five spaces. No cars. Bigfoot just like options.
📊 Bigfoot Financial Transparency
Humans ask Bigfoot how afford dis place. Bigfoot say:
- Trail donations
- Hard work
- Being mythical
- Something else (don’t ask)
HOA try come up mountain once. HOA not come back.
🎁 You Found Bigfoot
If you find dis page from map… you very nosey human.
Bigfoot respect that.
Claim Bigfoot RewardMott’s Mountain may or may not exist. Bigfoot say stop asking.